I was going to write about our music class today and how the little guy pulled a stack of chairs over on himself and we had to make an early departure. It was our last class of the session and I'm not sure when we will be singing up again, so it was upsetting we had to leave under such circumstances (especially as I've been going to the same class with the same teacher since the babe was 1).
But then I also wanted to write about how the babe really loves olives, dill pickles and capers. I thought I'd ponder what that meant in a 3.5 year old. While cleaning up after dinner, I had come to the conclusion that these food likes say a lot about my daughter.
And while I was saying good night to the babe, it became clear what I should be writing about. My own Mother, otherwise known as "Nana," will be arriving from Canada tomorrow morning for a visit. I mentioned that Nana was my Mama and I was so looking forward to seeing her. Then I mentioned that Nana took care of me when I was a little girl because she is my Mama (I thought I was just harmlessly going over the basic facts). The babe looked at me, all serious like, and asked where she was when I was a little girl and Nana was taking care of me? I replied that she had not been born yet. The babe then asked if she had been dead then? I said that she wasn't dead because I hadn't made her yet. And guess what she asked next?
"But how does the baby get in the Mama's tummy?" WHOA. I didn't think kids asked that question so young. So I stalled and kinda dodged the question. I am all about being honest with kids but I frankly hadn't done any research on how to discuss the birds and bees with a preschooler. So I told the babe that it was scientific and I had to look on the Internet to see how doctors and scientists suggest parents explain these things to kids (I tell her I have to look things up on the Internet all the time). I told her I wanted to make sure I explained it correctly to her so that she would understand. "OK, Mama," she replied.
That was a close call. I guess I better look into how to discuss these things in the most age-appropriate manner. But ultimately I guess I'll have to trust my Mama gut.
Tuesday, August 10, 2010
Monday, August 9, 2010
The Owie Obsession
Not to be overly dramatic, but the babe appears to be obsessed with "owies." In tonight's bed time story, Curious George had an owie. The babe immediately tried to grab the book to investigate the nature of his owie. It wasn't evident, but I knew it was somewhere on his foot. The babe was quite determined to figure out what was wrong with George but I ended up turning the page so we could move on.
I have been told this kind of obsessive behavior around minor or believed injuries is normal at this age, but frankly, I am pretty tired of hearing about it. Sadly we all get owies during our lives. And it's important to learn how to deal with them in the best and most positive way possible. It's not easy, but it's a very real part of being human.
When the babe comes to me with an owie and "needs" a band aid (daily), we have a little chat about the owie, check it out, and I usually give her a band aid if that will make her feel better. I have learnt that I have to pick my battles and am not willing to fight over band aids.
The thing that really gets me is that the babe appears to be a picker. I think it may be genetic, the tendency to pick, because I can remember my maternal Grandmother being a big picker. The babe will sit around and pick at her finger nails and toe nails constantly. My husband and I are always telling her to quit it, but the pause will only last a few seconds before she's at it again. I do not normally give band aids for any picking related injury unless there is real blood oozing out (which would not be a good thing).
I am REALLY looking forward to this obsession with owies to pass but am afraid that the picking phase may not...some people are just pickers. I hope it's not an indication of nervous energy.
If any of you have had similar experiences with the owie obsession, feel free to share! All tips on how to handle this predicament are more than welcome.
I have been told this kind of obsessive behavior around minor or believed injuries is normal at this age, but frankly, I am pretty tired of hearing about it. Sadly we all get owies during our lives. And it's important to learn how to deal with them in the best and most positive way possible. It's not easy, but it's a very real part of being human.
When the babe comes to me with an owie and "needs" a band aid (daily), we have a little chat about the owie, check it out, and I usually give her a band aid if that will make her feel better. I have learnt that I have to pick my battles and am not willing to fight over band aids.
The thing that really gets me is that the babe appears to be a picker. I think it may be genetic, the tendency to pick, because I can remember my maternal Grandmother being a big picker. The babe will sit around and pick at her finger nails and toe nails constantly. My husband and I are always telling her to quit it, but the pause will only last a few seconds before she's at it again. I do not normally give band aids for any picking related injury unless there is real blood oozing out (which would not be a good thing).
I am REALLY looking forward to this obsession with owies to pass but am afraid that the picking phase may not...some people are just pickers. I hope it's not an indication of nervous energy.
If any of you have had similar experiences with the owie obsession, feel free to share! All tips on how to handle this predicament are more than welcome.
Sunday, August 8, 2010
The Love
This morning the babe told me she doesn't love me. Her exact words were, "I don't love you." She was pretty clear, but I was luckily able to just let it roll off me. I was surprised, as it was the first time, but I had expected it would happen eventually. It was a bit of a rough morning. I tried my best but know that I was at fault as much as she was.
I've mentioned that I find weekends difficult as a Stay-at-Home Mother, and this weekend reminded me why. Having all 4 of us home for 2 days just seems like a long time. Kids don't given parents much of a break, even if the parents need a break. These early childhood years can be both brilliant and challenging. I always hope for more brilliance and less challenge, but it doesn't always work out that way. Especially on the weekend!
I commented to my husband this evening that it felt like we were living in an insane asylum (the kids were running around chasing each other and screaming at the tops of their lungs). But I followed up with the fact that I was glad we had had the little guy so close to the babe so they could be buddies. As much as they drive each other nuts, and drive us, their parents, nuts, I suppose it's all good in the end. I have been told we will look back at these years with fondness. And while that may be hard to understand right now, I have no doubt that it will prove true (even if my daughter declares she does not love me while I am trying to enjoy my morning coffee).
I've mentioned that I find weekends difficult as a Stay-at-Home Mother, and this weekend reminded me why. Having all 4 of us home for 2 days just seems like a long time. Kids don't given parents much of a break, even if the parents need a break. These early childhood years can be both brilliant and challenging. I always hope for more brilliance and less challenge, but it doesn't always work out that way. Especially on the weekend!
I commented to my husband this evening that it felt like we were living in an insane asylum (the kids were running around chasing each other and screaming at the tops of their lungs). But I followed up with the fact that I was glad we had had the little guy so close to the babe so they could be buddies. As much as they drive each other nuts, and drive us, their parents, nuts, I suppose it's all good in the end. I have been told we will look back at these years with fondness. And while that may be hard to understand right now, I have no doubt that it will prove true (even if my daughter declares she does not love me while I am trying to enjoy my morning coffee).
Saturday, August 7, 2010
It's All in the Name
It's hard to chose a name for your child. But what you don't realize when you chose the name of your first born, is how many times a day you will be saying it. At one point I think I said the babe's name back to back four times when I was trying to get my message through to her. I caught my husband doing the same thing.
A name is a critical thing. It will be a part of your child's identity through life. It will be used in both positive and negative ways. And it is a lot of pressure to chose the right one. In fact, our son was nameless for 3 days as we weighed different options. In the end we stood over his little hospital basin and repeated a few names to see what he would react to. We had a clear winner and we went with it. And I still think it was the right choice. I'm actually quite happy with the names we chose for both kids.
My only recommendation to new parents is to chose a name you don't mind saying over and over and over again. Because if there's any chance you'll tire of it, you need to keep on thinking.
A name is a critical thing. It will be a part of your child's identity through life. It will be used in both positive and negative ways. And it is a lot of pressure to chose the right one. In fact, our son was nameless for 3 days as we weighed different options. In the end we stood over his little hospital basin and repeated a few names to see what he would react to. We had a clear winner and we went with it. And I still think it was the right choice. I'm actually quite happy with the names we chose for both kids.
My only recommendation to new parents is to chose a name you don't mind saying over and over and over again. Because if there's any chance you'll tire of it, you need to keep on thinking.
Friday, August 6, 2010
All Kinds of Pills
I'm not a fan of taking a lot of pills, but I use them when I consider medication/herbal remedy necessary. I deemed it necessary today when I was hit by a splitting head ache and was stuck indoors with my kids. And while I still have stiffness in my hands (which I'm hoping is hormonal and not arthritis), I have decided to hold off on taking regular drugs for the problem. I am not ready to make a daily commitment to address the issue.
I am, however, a fan of taking my multivitamin. I feel it fills in the gaps that have been left by my diet.
I was also very dedicated to my prenatal vitamins. But I never took my last one. After 4 years of taking them all through pregnancy and breastfeeding, I was too emotional about taking the last pill. It is still sitting in its container on our vitamin collection tray (a bar tray). I don't think I'll ever be able to take it because it was such an important part of my life for so long. And I don't think I can get rid of it because that will mean saying good bye to that period of my life.
All that said, I am going to look into a herbal pill which apparently helps you chill out a bit. A friend has highly recommended them and I think I'll give it a try. She is the mother of a 2.5 year old and says it has totally calmed her. It's called Calming Complex with Gaba made by Source Naturals and I am going to pick some up next time I'm at Whole Foods. I'll let you know how it goes. It's all about taking the right pills!
I am, however, a fan of taking my multivitamin. I feel it fills in the gaps that have been left by my diet.
I was also very dedicated to my prenatal vitamins. But I never took my last one. After 4 years of taking them all through pregnancy and breastfeeding, I was too emotional about taking the last pill. It is still sitting in its container on our vitamin collection tray (a bar tray). I don't think I'll ever be able to take it because it was such an important part of my life for so long. And I don't think I can get rid of it because that will mean saying good bye to that period of my life.
All that said, I am going to look into a herbal pill which apparently helps you chill out a bit. A friend has highly recommended them and I think I'll give it a try. She is the mother of a 2.5 year old and says it has totally calmed her. It's called Calming Complex with Gaba made by Source Naturals and I am going to pick some up next time I'm at Whole Foods. I'll let you know how it goes. It's all about taking the right pills!
Thursday, August 5, 2010
Wake Up Call
As parents, we have sort of had to get used to waking up early EVERY DAY. It has been a difficult transition for my husband and I as neither of us are morning people. While the babe is getting better at waking up at a decent 7 to 7:15 am time frame, the little guy seems to be going in the opposite direction. This morning he was up at 5:50 am. Who needs an alarm clock!
There is nothing like being jolted out of a deep sleep by a crying child. And the quick realization that the crying child will wake your other child if you don't bolt out of bed immediately and try to calm the crying child. That's what happened this morning. Sadly, I wasn't able to calm him back to sleep and he just kept on crying every time I tried to leave the room. I broke down and brought him into our bed.
Unlike the babe, who loved to sleep with us when she was little, our son has never been a fan of sharing a bed with his Mama and Papa. He is, however, a fan of watching cartoons in Mama and Papa's bed when it is too early for Mama and Papa to leave the bed. We resisted his demands for a good chunk of time and tried to doze, but eventually we had to give in. The TV was turned on at quite an early hour. No wonder he was so annoyed by the time his sister woke up at 7 am.
I am wondering how I can promote him hanging out by himself in his crib on the days he wakes up at a silly hour (like anything between 5 and 7am). My friend has the Fisher Price rain forest crib music/light/moving figure thing set up and says it works. The kids pass a lot of time being amused by it and aren't as needy when they first get up. Perhaps it is something we will need to consider, because Mama and Papa need their precious sleep!
There is nothing like being jolted out of a deep sleep by a crying child. And the quick realization that the crying child will wake your other child if you don't bolt out of bed immediately and try to calm the crying child. That's what happened this morning. Sadly, I wasn't able to calm him back to sleep and he just kept on crying every time I tried to leave the room. I broke down and brought him into our bed.
Unlike the babe, who loved to sleep with us when she was little, our son has never been a fan of sharing a bed with his Mama and Papa. He is, however, a fan of watching cartoons in Mama and Papa's bed when it is too early for Mama and Papa to leave the bed. We resisted his demands for a good chunk of time and tried to doze, but eventually we had to give in. The TV was turned on at quite an early hour. No wonder he was so annoyed by the time his sister woke up at 7 am.
I am wondering how I can promote him hanging out by himself in his crib on the days he wakes up at a silly hour (like anything between 5 and 7am). My friend has the Fisher Price rain forest crib music/light/moving figure thing set up and says it works. The kids pass a lot of time being amused by it and aren't as needy when they first get up. Perhaps it is something we will need to consider, because Mama and Papa need their precious sleep!
Wednesday, August 4, 2010
Holding a Grudge
I have been known to hold a grudge. It's not a good thing, and I don't intentionally do it, I'm just saying it can happen.
That's why it's so difficult having young kids. They can do things that hurt you physically as well as emotionally. The babe has told me many times over the past week and a half that she likes school more than being at home. And she likes hanging out with her friends better than being stuck at home with me. I get it. I like school better as well. But August is a month we must all spend together and I'm trying to make the best of it, despite the weather.
I did a rare thing today and lay down on the couch in front of both my kids. The little guy brought me a blanket and tried to tuck me in and give me kisses. The babe abandoned her play doh and ran over to get in on the action. Before I knew it they were both crawling all over and suffocating me. I was handling it all pretty well until the babe started pulling my hair. I asked her to stop, telling her it was hurting me, but she didn't stop. With about 60 pounds of weight on my upper body I wasn't able to pull her off effectively. In the end I got them off but not before I had lost some hair as well as my temper. I suppose kids like to push things past the limit because they don't understand where the limit is.
The babe acted as if nothing big had happened and continued on. I tried to talk to her and explain I didn't appreciate having my hair pulled out. As she walked back to her play doh in the dining room I realized that sometimes I need to let things go. My kids are little. And while I am trying to teach them how to be good people, it doesn't all click in overnight. I cannot hold a grudge against them because they said or did the wrong thing. It is my job to teach them to be good, honest, respectful, loving people who do not hold grudges.
So next time they are being ridiculous, I am going to try and check in with myself and remember, THEY ARE JUST LITTLE KIDS. I need to keep my very high expectations in check. Before I know it, they will be grown and I will miss their precious innocence and imperfections. Hopefully I'll still have the hair on my head.
That's why it's so difficult having young kids. They can do things that hurt you physically as well as emotionally. The babe has told me many times over the past week and a half that she likes school more than being at home. And she likes hanging out with her friends better than being stuck at home with me. I get it. I like school better as well. But August is a month we must all spend together and I'm trying to make the best of it, despite the weather.
I did a rare thing today and lay down on the couch in front of both my kids. The little guy brought me a blanket and tried to tuck me in and give me kisses. The babe abandoned her play doh and ran over to get in on the action. Before I knew it they were both crawling all over and suffocating me. I was handling it all pretty well until the babe started pulling my hair. I asked her to stop, telling her it was hurting me, but she didn't stop. With about 60 pounds of weight on my upper body I wasn't able to pull her off effectively. In the end I got them off but not before I had lost some hair as well as my temper. I suppose kids like to push things past the limit because they don't understand where the limit is.
The babe acted as if nothing big had happened and continued on. I tried to talk to her and explain I didn't appreciate having my hair pulled out. As she walked back to her play doh in the dining room I realized that sometimes I need to let things go. My kids are little. And while I am trying to teach them how to be good people, it doesn't all click in overnight. I cannot hold a grudge against them because they said or did the wrong thing. It is my job to teach them to be good, honest, respectful, loving people who do not hold grudges.
So next time they are being ridiculous, I am going to try and check in with myself and remember, THEY ARE JUST LITTLE KIDS. I need to keep my very high expectations in check. Before I know it, they will be grown and I will miss their precious innocence and imperfections. Hopefully I'll still have the hair on my head.
Tuesday, August 3, 2010
New Tricks
The little guy copies everything his big sister does. Although he can't say her name, he is rapidly increasing his verbal and physical abilities due, in part, to her assistance.
The babe will stand next to the little guy's high chair and practically yell words she wants him to repeat: "SAY HOT," "SAY ROLL," for example. He gets a kick out of it and so does she (and yes, those 2 words have officially been added onto his ever-expanding list). That said, I know he is not speaking as much as he could BECAUSE he has an older sister who does all the talking for him.
Another new trick is blowing kisses. The only trouble is, he doesn't understand that he needs to actually move his hand away from his mouth after kissing it. The intent is obvious, and that's what matters. He also likes to do the "shhhh" gesture with his finger up at his mouth when it's time to be quiet. It rarely works out that anyone is quiet around here when they're supposed to be, but it's very cute to see him try.
The babe will stand next to the little guy's high chair and practically yell words she wants him to repeat: "SAY HOT," "SAY ROLL," for example. He gets a kick out of it and so does she (and yes, those 2 words have officially been added onto his ever-expanding list). That said, I know he is not speaking as much as he could BECAUSE he has an older sister who does all the talking for him.
Another new trick is blowing kisses. The only trouble is, he doesn't understand that he needs to actually move his hand away from his mouth after kissing it. The intent is obvious, and that's what matters. He also likes to do the "shhhh" gesture with his finger up at his mouth when it's time to be quiet. It rarely works out that anyone is quiet around here when they're supposed to be, but it's very cute to see him try.
Monday, August 2, 2010
More Potty Talk
I suppose I should be happy the babe goes pee and poop in the potty on her own. A while back, I would have never believed we'd arrive at a place where she can walk upstairs by herself, go to the potty, wash her hands, and come back down to re-join the little guy and I. But here we are. The only problem with our arrangement is that the babe never flushes the toilet. Good for for the environment, bad for me.
Pretty much every time I run upstairs to use the bathroom I am confronted with a yucky looking toilet bowl. The babe tends to do quite a few smaller number twos throughout the day and will just leave them floating there.
Again, I know I shouldn't complain, but given the fact that I rarely get to use the toilet alone, it would be nice to actually enter a bathroom with a toilet that "appears" to be clean.
In the grand scheme of things...this is not a big deal. I know things are going to get a lost more disgusting (again) when it comes time to train the little guy. But for now, I'd love to be able to just sit down on a clean toilet and do my business. Ah, to dream.
Pretty much every time I run upstairs to use the bathroom I am confronted with a yucky looking toilet bowl. The babe tends to do quite a few smaller number twos throughout the day and will just leave them floating there.
Again, I know I shouldn't complain, but given the fact that I rarely get to use the toilet alone, it would be nice to actually enter a bathroom with a toilet that "appears" to be clean.
In the grand scheme of things...this is not a big deal. I know things are going to get a lost more disgusting (again) when it comes time to train the little guy. But for now, I'd love to be able to just sit down on a clean toilet and do my business. Ah, to dream.
Sunday, August 1, 2010
The Cuddles
I have a good friend due to have her first baby at the end of the month. Today she came by with her husband to pick up some baby stuff we're lending them. I am glad to see it put to good use. But it also made me realize I don't really need to keep all this stuff. My baby is 19 months old now and will never need a little swing or bouncy seat again.
Thinking about it made me a bit sad. It also made me long for the cuddles I used to get from both of my kids when they were babies. There is a closeness you lose as your children grow, and I miss it.
So it's funny that on a day I was missing my snuggles, my son gave me such a special gift. The kids went to bed a little later than usual tonight and my son was exhausted by the time I was getting him in his onesie and sleep sack. I don't know how it happened but I ended up holding him and rocking back and forth while humming. And he let me just hold him. He didn't squirm. He didn't try to wiggle out of the hug. And he didn't push away from me with all his strength. This lasted a few minutes, and it was bliss.
There's nothing like holding a little one in your arms. A few years ago I wouldn't have believed that I could miss it.
Thinking about it made me a bit sad. It also made me long for the cuddles I used to get from both of my kids when they were babies. There is a closeness you lose as your children grow, and I miss it.
So it's funny that on a day I was missing my snuggles, my son gave me such a special gift. The kids went to bed a little later than usual tonight and my son was exhausted by the time I was getting him in his onesie and sleep sack. I don't know how it happened but I ended up holding him and rocking back and forth while humming. And he let me just hold him. He didn't squirm. He didn't try to wiggle out of the hug. And he didn't push away from me with all his strength. This lasted a few minutes, and it was bliss.
There's nothing like holding a little one in your arms. A few years ago I wouldn't have believed that I could miss it.
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