The Kind of Mom I Am

We woke this morning to a full on power outage.  The little guy was standing at my door crying and I quickly realized it was going to be a long day. Saturdays are always long days, but this had an extra special "long day" feeling.

Realizing there was not going to be any snuggling in bed watching cartoons and dozing, we all headed downstairs for some cereal and fruit. The power was still not back by the time we finished breakfast.  What next?  We decided it would be fun to go to the park.  So we all got dressed, packed our drinks and snacks, went to the front door to get our shoes, and BAM; the power came back on. 

I immediately told everyone to take off their shoes and go sit in front of the TV.  I got the kids set up with some quality programming, made a pot of coffee, cleaned the kitchen, started the dishwasher and stripped our bed to get the laundry going (I had found children's snot caked onto my duvet cover earlier in the morning).

So yes, it is super lame that I parked the kids in front of the TV just as we were about to go play, but I did redeem myself.  After the show ended and I was up to speed on all my basic chores, we put those shoes back on and went to the park for an hour.  And that was how we got through our Saturday morning.  Let's see how the afternoon goes.

We're Going to the Zoo, Zoo, Zoo

I wanted to share some photos from our trip to the zoo today, but the computer is giving me grief.

On top of the zoo, we made it to the library after nap time.

It was another successful non-school day.

I think the trick to having both kids at home all day every day is to plan activities and get out of the house.  It makes the time fly by and tires us all out.   

As such, I'm off to bed.  Good night!

Mean Girls

We were at the park this afternoon after school.  I was doing my best to keep an eye on both kids, although that has definitely become increasingly difficult as the little guy has gotten older and is running around and climbing on everything he sees.

At one point I switched my gaze from the babe (who was doing her thing on the monkey bars) to the little guy.  I caught him waving to a little girl by the small plastic house he loves to play inside.  The little girl proceeded to push him.  My son looked a bit surprised but continued giving his beautiful smile and his sweet wave.  She didn't seem to care about his obvious charms.  "That is definitely not the kind of girl I want my son hanging out with," I thought to myself.

It made me realize he is growing up fast and I won't always be able to be hovering above him.  That said, he's still my sweet, sweet, little boy and I will always be there to watch his back.

Where are Those Words?

The little guy is remarkably cute.  He has a great smile and gives awesome hugs (he will sometimes pat your back as he's hugging).  He has the sweetest dancing technique and is very good at pointing at what he wants.  He has got "Mama," "Papa," and "Hi" down pat.  Ask him what a lion says, and he roars.  When he sees a dog he points and starts barking.  But when I ask him to repeat pretty basic words like "up" or "down," I get the "ahh" sound. 

I know kids develop at different rates, but at what age should I worry that he's not picking up vocab and putting it to good use?  Not to compare my children, but the babe was pretty amazing in the verbal department (and still is).  If I don't start seeing some progress soon, this will be at the top of my list of questions at the next pediatrician appointment.

In other news, the babe was a true gem today.  It was a pleasure being her Mom and her behavior was pretty stellar.  We headed back down to the "gym" (our basement) for another round of afternoon activities.  In the past 24 hours I have hidden the broken door, set up our new basketball net and T-Ball contraption and put down some more padding on the floor.  The gym is starting to take shape and I think both kids really dig it.  Hopefully things will continue on the up and up.

The Basement

I suppose we all have our bad days.  But from 5:00 pm to about 6:40 pm was a very rough patch for the kids and I.

Following my new parenting philosophy, "try harder," I had our after-school activities all planned out.  I had even explained them to the babe on the way to school so she'd know what to expect in afternoon.

The plan:

• water the vegetable garden 
• prepare pineapple for a snack
• play sports in the basement
• have dinner
• watch some relaxing and educational television 

I spent a chunk of the day cleaning and organizing the basement in preparation for our activities.  With the weather getting hotter and the bugs coming out of hiding, the basement is becoming increasingly appealing.

Basement activities:

• jumping on trampoline
• kicking soccer ball around
• bowling set
• baseball set (both heavily padded)
• practicing dribbling the basketball (our new toddler basketball net should be arriving this week)
• rocking thingy
• giggling in the tent

Our basement was gutted last summer after we discovered a mold infestation (good times).  Well, the renovation job wasn't top of the line, to put it nicely.  And after all the effort I put into trying to make the basement cleaner, safer and generally more appealing, I was reminded of how dangerous crappy workmanship can be.

Our plan was moving along smoothly and we were having a grand 'ole time downstairs.  The babe and I were kicking the soccer ball back and forth and the little guy was moving randomly from activity to activity.  He decided to join his sister closer to the washer and dryer and touched the sliding door in front of the washer (I was also doing laundry).  And BOOM.  The whole door fell off the track and came slamming down to the floor.  I don't know exactly what happened or how my little boy managed to not be crushed by the door, but today we realized, yet again, how precious life is.

The little guy was screaming, and the babe started screaming and I frantically tried to assess if my boy's foot had been broken and if we needed to go to the hospital.  His leg was scraped, as was his foot, but considering what could have happened, we got off easy. I'm guessing he must have moved out of the way (quick kid!). 

I was hugging both of them and telling them everything was going to be OK.  I called my husband at work and while I was trying to explain what had just happened, the babe started screaming again and threw the plastic bowling ball at me.

I've noticed that she freaks out when the little guy gets hurt and I have to tend to him.  This was just further proof that we have a jealousy issue on our hands and I have to be diligent in my efforts to give equal attention to both of them.  It's just not as easy as it sounds, especially when a door has nearly crushed your 17 month old baby (today is his 17 month b-day, and yes, I know, he's not a baby anymore).

Sadly the babe was a nightmare until my husband got home.  It brought me to my knees and had me wishing I could rewind to the afternoon when I was working on the basement so I could take down the crappy door.  I really should have checked how secure it was before encouraging our play date down there (especially as the kitchen cupboard just fell on me 2 weeks ago!).  Baby proofing 101, right?  

Your whole life can change from one minute to the next.  And I'm eternally grateful that this was another learning experience, and not a call to 911.

Letting Go

This week, as you know, I have been trying harder with the babe.

I am trying to be more affectionate, positive, encouraging, patient, loving and supportive.  Since the little guy was born almost 1.5 years ago, I think I have not given the babe the attention she deserves.  No one is perfect, but I think I owe the babe more.

As her favorite words are "I want to do it," I have been letting go more and letting her do "it," whatever "it" is.  I am trying to take a step back so that she can learn and feel needed.  I am trying to let go of my inner control freak, and to embrace being a Mom who lets her kids learn through trial and error.

On Wednesday I hosted my book club, and I got the babe involved in getting ready.  She helped cut the pita, transfer olives into a bowl, and fold napkins.  These tasks took a really long time, but I could tell they made her feel important.  That was a good feeling.

Last night I let her water our new garden. The promise of watering the garden was the only thing that made our trip home from school pleasant.  She knew what we were going to do and she was into it.  I had also promised she could help prepare the corn on the cob.  So we sat on the floor and peeled the corn skins back and made a big mess.  The babe was involved in making dinner, and she liked it.  And you know what, I liked it to.

What I'm realizing is that I have to keep trying.  I have to keep thinking up projects for her.  I have to keep her involved and active.  I have to let her make mistakes.  And I have to learn to let go.

The Front Lawn

Remember yesterday when I went on and on about how challenging our front lawn is (getting the kids from the car to the front door)?  Well most days this is the truth.  But because I wrote about it yesterday, and because my brother and sister-no-law (SNL) are in town visiting, I have to take it back (but just for today).

We had a most amazing time on the front lawn today.  Shoes were off, the kids were running around in the grass screaming with joy, and my bro and SNL were chasing them all around the place.  My hubby also took the day off and was working the soil in the garden a little more.

It made me so happy to have the space to enjoy the crazy summer weather, and to bask in the joy of my awesome family. 

Friday afternoon with 4 adults and 2 kids is a lot easier to handle than Friday afternoon with 1 adult and 2 kids!!

The Distance

I don't know if I've told you, but the distance between the street (where we park) and our front door is immense...and not just in kid terms...in adult terms.  It takes a few serious trips to get groceries, assorted bags and children in the door safely. As much as I don't get structured workouts, I do haul a whole lotta weight up and down our path on a daily basis.

Lately I've been having a seriously difficult time getting both kids into the house.  We get back from wherever we've been, and the babe automatically runs off onto the lawn, or the porch, or to her gardening tools, the chalk, or the stray soccer ball which is always hanging around.  Then the little guy jerks himself out of my arms because he wants in on the action too (I miss those infant car seat days).  At this point I usually REALLY have to go to the bathroom, am pretty dehydrated, and want either a coffee or a glass of wine (or both, just to cover all my bases).  But the kids want to play, and what Mother doesn't want her kids to play?

Some days I suck it up and let them run amok (this is probably not going to help my bladder in the long run).  Other days I drag them in the front door kicking and screaming (literally) so I can take shoes off, carry/guide them upstairs to go to the bathroom, and then back downstairs where we put shoes back on, and then head out (without coffee or wine). 

The nice weather is a really big hit and I feel guilty when I force them inside.  And I really am trying to avoid temper tantrums which usually involve the babe yelling "...but I DON'T WANT TO BE INSIIIIIIDE."  Sometimes I just have to drag them in because I have too much to do. I end up making a bunch of special art project and snack related promises to the babe to try and ease the transition (it doesn't always work).  And at this point I've also probably been yelling at them to get inside and counting to 3 so many times the neighbors must think I'm a mad woman.

When we moved here I was so jazzed about all the yard space and possibilities for endless exploration.  And I am still psyched to have it.  I just wish I could shrink the distance between the car and our front door on the days that I DON'T WANT TO BE OUTSIIIIIIDE!

Activities, Anyone?

Hockey, hockey, hockey, hockey. Welcome to my world. The Montreal Canadiens have been playing the Washington Capitals in the playoffs, and it has been a big part of our life lately (my husband is a huge Montreal fan and we just happen to live in Washington, DC).

Guess what we're doing right now? Guess what we did last night (the Ottawa Senators, which is my official team, is also in the playoffs)? A whole lotta hockey going on.

Anyway. My folks are in town from Ottawa which is absolutely lovely. It is so great seeing them interact with their only grandchildren. I've noticed that this has been a really nice visit in that the kids are much more "under control" than they have been in the past. As you may know, the first few years with itsy bitsy children in the house are crazy. Things are in flux and new parents are trying to keep in the game. This is the first visit from my folks where I feel like I have a pretty good handle on my parenting. And you know what? It feels good!

In other news I have been struggling to keep my daughter from freaking out after school every day. Spring is in the air and that has created some serious outdoor expectations. The babe's after school greeting is now: "Mama, where can we go now?" It's as if our home isn't good enough.

Many days end in screaming and tears before we've even made it home from school. And I honestly am trying to keep her entertained and active. Some days I do the park, which is exceptionally challenging with 2 very active kids. Some days I think of some other activity, such as the library last Monday, to keep us occupied. But no matter what I think up, it always ends in more tears when it's time to pack up and go home. Seriously, even if I give her what she wants, she's still angry at me for dragging her home. If I have this much trouble with a 3 year old, I am extremely nervous about our future.

Speaking of after-school activities, this week we started a whole new phase of life....soccer. Yes, she's only 3, but she is now on a soccer "team" of 3 year olds in Bethesda, MD. On Tuesday, I officially became a "Soccer Mom." If you knew me a few years back, you'd appreciate how humorous this new title is. At least I'm not driving a mini van, yet (no offense to all you mini van drivers).

To make it even more humorous, I baked brownies for the school bake sale on Wednesday. They just happen to be raising money for the local park. Can't say no to that, now can you?

Sometimes I wonder where "I" went...and then I remember that I have willingly created this new reality for myself. No point fighting it. Might as well embrace it. Here's to soccer practice, hockey playoffs, the annoying and distracting park, and being an egg free, dairy free, peanut free, tree nut free, brownie baking, stay-at-home Mom.

This Past Week

Last week I was at the Rite Aide to buy some overnight diapers for the babe. A homeless man sitting outside the front door jumped up to help me with maneuvering the stroller through the entrance. He was very kind.

While I was in the store I thought about giving him some change on my way out. I normally don't give money to people on the street as we're more of the registered charity kind of people. But he had been very thoughtful so I grabbed some coins from my wallet as I prepared to leave the store. When I made it through the door, he was sitting outside talking on a cell phone. I put the change back in my pocket and just smiled as I walked by.

I appreciated the help with the stroller, but I just can't justify giving money to someone on a cell phone. Is that wrong?

On another matter, my landlady came by this week with some work guys to check out our CAC system. She was sweet enough to bring an orange beanie baby for the babe named "Dearest." The babe seemed pretty impressed with the gift. After the landlady left, I went to the bathroom, with the door open, as usual. As I was washing my hands, the babe snuck in behind me and dumped Dearest in the toilet. I'm not sure what to do with Dearest now. It says surface wash only, so I guess the babe can just play with a toilet water toy. It had been flushed, so it can't be that bad.

Not a Baby Any More

In my head, I know the babe is not a babe any more. She's a toddler. This became obvious today when we attended a make up sign language/music class in Arlington (we've missed two classes and I want to make sure we get our money's worth!).

The class was for children up to 18 months old. The babe was one of only 2 toddlers in the room (the rest were babies sitting calmly in their Mother's laps). My daughter and her new buddy were into everything, wouldn't sit down, and were generally in everyone's business. They were super cute, but I could see how other Moms may not think it's "cute" that my daughter is trying to "share" (take) their child's drum.

It was amusing to watch her, but challenging to try and balance discipline with learning in a group environment. When I was pregnant I had a lot of time to read about being pregnant and the first few months of a child's life. I haven't had a chance to read about this "stage" and I'm not really sure what I should be doing with a 15 month old.

Group activities expose your child to other kids (which is great for the 'stay at home with Mom' kinda kids), but they also expose you to other parents. And it's tough to parent in front of other parents. There's always the concern that they may be better at it than you. Or they may be more up tight than you and be secretly judging you. Who knows. Perhaps I am worrying more than I need to. Kids will be kids (until your kid gets pushed over by another kid, which just happened in the class held before our Wednesday session).

Despite these little issues, I'm pretty thrilled we signed up for a few activities. It's nice to have an official place to be other than a doctor's appointment!

It's 2008. Time to Get Out of the House

I've been feeling anxious about not having enough to do with the babe. The only reasons we leave the house are to shop, go to the doctor, meet up with people, or to randomly walk around DC. That's not enough. After much thought (mostly over the Holidays), I admitted to myself that it was time to get involved in some organized activities. I'm always a little hesitant about joining things as there's never a guarantee I'll like the activity or the people I'm doing it with. But in the babe's best interest, I had to do something.

My mission of the day was to track some activity down and register. I quickly realized that there are many more toddler programs in the suburbs (not a big surprise there, I guess). After some research, I signed up for two classes in Arlington (Virginia) that sound like a good match:

1. Mom and Toddler Workout, which is apparently a child-friendly workout for Moms that includes everything from step, to yoga and free weights. I don't know how I'll do all that while keeping an eye on the babe, but I'm willing to try.

2. Kindermusik Sign and Sing, which will teach us 130 new signs for the babe to communicate with. Music is somehow incorporated into the learning process. If this class helps the babe communicate, that will certainly be worth the price of admission. I have a friend in Canada who teaches baby sign language. She's encouraged me to find a class and I'm relieved I've finally gotten it together enough to sign up for one. This course uses American Sign Language (ASL) which, according to my friend, is very important.

This will give us two activities a week which will give us ample time for plain old socializing, shopping, cleaning and chilling out in the play zone. I am hoping it's a good balance, because after all, isn't that what all Moms are after?

The Playzone

We have just spent a nice chunk of change on a playzone for the babe. I was getting tired of moving the coffee table, setting out the blankets and toys and sitting on the floor to monitor play time by the 42 inch television screen every day. There was also the part about putting everything away every night that I wasn't a fan of. It was time for a new plan: the playzone plan.

I really love it. It's functional, colorful, large (with the two extension kits we purchased), and perfect for a baby to play in. The foam mats on the floor are each a letter of the alphabet! Who doesn't love the alphabet?

Why then does my daughter start to whine and cry if I leave her in it alone for more than 20 minutes? I though the playzone would allow me time to sit on the couch and read, write in my very neglected blog, or work in the kitchen. It's only been fully set up with the foam pads since last night, but so far the babe seems to have a problem being behind the colorful bars alone for an extended period of time.

I am hoping and praying that this is just something that will take time to get used to. There are enough toys and happy things in there to keep her occupied. And I don't see why, if she has a full belly and a clean diaper, she can't just chill out and have a good time in her new land of baby fun. We shall see.